Monday, October 01, 2007
October Festivities
Finally, September's over. God, what a useless month. Thirty days of my life down the crapper and poorly filtered into somebody else's tap water. I hope I never live another month like September again. It was spent doing nothing but... nothing. Sometimes, it may appear that I'm not doing much, when I'm actually staring into the Gallowmere reservoir of intuition, imagination, and introspectre. But this time, I can't say that. September, I spent my time who knows where doing who knows what? I think it may have something to do with space-time continuum or something esoteric like that. Gallowmere was put into a complete stasis after the last major wave of banal minutiae struck. Top that with a flurry of ennui,and we have a disaster of Roland Emmerich shitty effects plagued movie proportions. The residents are slowly shaking out of this stasis. Neurons in my big empty head are starting to form connections again, I'm thawing out. The weather here is finally getting cool again. The sun is going back into the sea earlier nowadays. It won't be long until daylight savings kick in and the sun gets tricked into hiding under the sea an hour earlier than usual. From there, the only things next to come will be terminally chilly weather. That's when Gallowmere thrives the most. Crops will flourish, ideas will wheel freely. People will be bogged down, and will hence, bog me down less. I can't wait, my thoughts will leap from my skull once again like overcooked egg goo from an eggshell in a microwave.
This month I should be getting back on track, meeting my daily quotas for my projects. There are a few laws I hope to get made in the Gallowmere Congress of Nongress. A lot of it has to do with stupid people. I've conducted a theory that a lot of the turbulent weather in Gallowmere lately has been caused by the ever increasing epidemic of stupidity the world permeates and embraces. I've been sucking it up the way a yuppie sucks up coke in a seedy strip bar. I've been concerning myself with the stupid things people say and do a little too much. It's not that I take them into concideration, it's that I hear them or see what they do, and they stick to me. I think about them more than I'd care to. It's like an average relationship or something, except without the sex, struggles for power, and total awkwardness. I want this stuff out of my head.
Thus, it's time I start making a few laws which may help counter the stupid epidemic we're dealing with.
1) Stupid people should not have the right to think. Stupid people thinking is a dangerous thing. I can sit and watch people get decapitated and disemboweled all day, but I am purely terrified to the bone marrow by how seriously stupid people are taken. Some of them are bigwigs like George W. Bush, Dinesh "Distort D'Newsa" D'Souza, Ann Cunter, Ray Cumfart, and Kirk "Growing Pain in the Ass" Cameron. While others, most others are just the Average Joe and Plain Jane who keep on listening to them, voting for them, and buying their incoherent diatribes and knee jerk manifestos. It causes a lot of harm in the world taking stupid people seriously, a lot of poor decisions have been made because of them, and a lot of good decisions haven't been made because they couldn't comprehend the gravity of the matters at hand. If somebody has enough nerve to react to knowledge, information, and theory the way a vampire may react to garlic, I have nothing to say to them. They should really have no right to have a say about anything. That would help things incredibly. And from there, idiots should be prevented from being public figures. That one may be trickier to implement since sometimes it may be tougher to delineate the good from the bad, and in politics, a lot of partisan bullshit clogs the system. But outrageously retarded comments by people of the likes of Mr. Distort D'Newsa should be shot on sight,on national television, a bullet between the eyes, and replayed from every angle. It will make people much more cautious of the words they chose to use. People may have the right to have little brainfarts every so often, a slip of tongue, a faux pas, it happens to the best and the brightest, though hopefully people of this caliber make sure to let it happen the least they can. But if it's a frequent behaviour, blow their lack of brains out.
2) Sterilization for all. People like to fuck, which is all fine and well, but then babies come from that, and most people aren't adept to being parents. Some people are also very stupid and just pass on their stupid genes to their children. Another problem is that they are nowhere near financially able to take care of their children, but they go on having twelve kids. My friend [Spaghetti Western], the atheist conservative cowboy is the king of controversial political slogans. One line of his which I've promised I'd cite as many times as possible, even if it doesn't fit is: "It solidified my belief that... my parents would have done me a great service if they aborted me when they found out they were pregnant with me." But that's not the saying that I pulled his name up for, it's this one: "If you can't feed, don't breed." This is why I say there should be a law that all people are sterilized. They can go through psychological tests and assessments, and have a reasonable enough income to support the baby before they're given the right to pop one out of the oven. Hypothetical political imbroglios which may ensue from that aside, that would solve a great deal of the world's problems.
3) Media with artistic integrity. As a character says in my book, "Art imitates life. Life imitates art." Media celebrates stupidity, watch a television for an hour, and dare to disagree with that. Stupid media is produced to pander to the stupid viewers who then become dumber by the ante being lowered by the media nutheads who then need to lower the ante once again to pander to the viewers with nullifying brain cells. Instead of worrying about how many tits and muff hairs are seen in movies, and how many times the word ' fuck' is said, the shadowy figures in the censorship ministries with their big shiny scissors should be more concerned with the level of how idiotic movies are. If idiots aren't pandered to, they would have no choice but to watch what's on, or not watch anything at all. They would probably turn to drinking or fucking, but no harm there since they'd be sterilized. Worst case scenario, they'd just get STDs or into car accidents.I just call that evolution in motion.
Just in case someone reading this is actually a member of the League of Idiocy, note that most of this is in a satirical manner. I have no political affiliation, if I had to say I was anything, it'd be Libertarian, though sometimes I have totalitarian fantasies. Maybe I'm a Libertarian Totalitarian. I have no desire to get into politics, so idiots can rest assured. As well, if there are things you wish to nitpick with my laws, fuck you. Go on national TV and get your fucking brains blown out. That's all I have to say.
There, I got that off my chest. That tension was building up like a tumour. Some things, you need to just do every once in a while to remember who you are and to release stress. One of those things, you know, like punching a pacifier down a baby's throat.
"See everyone in hell..." ~ [Spaghetti Western]
